Sunday, April 10, 2011

THE BATTLE OF THE ST'S


                                            
Students Bus Concession, that's what 'ST' stands for .I dunno ..don't ask me how. But with this, a student need only pay 1/4th of the bus charge. And fortunately, when bus fares in Kerala hiked, the ST rates continued to be the same. Cool? Think again.

There are three golden rules to remember if you are an ST ( i.e student giving bus concession). I had to learn it the hard way.

RULE NO.1  An ST Must Act Blind

Nowhere is it written in the law that an ST cannot sit, but it is accepted by all conductors, drivers, most full ticket passengers and some ST's (traitors!). So when you are an ST, and see a seat...then what are you waiting for ? Sit! You must now close your eyes to the people glaring at you for 'stealing their seats'. It will be easier for you to pretend you are asleep. Of course, an ST must have have the courtesy to get up for an old or pregnant lady..(but so should every other able body in the bus!)

RULE NO.2 An ST Must Act Deaf

 Sometimes the conductor will get grumpy when he sees an overflow of STs or most of the time he will have no reason to. Nevertheless,never mind him..Never.
              
 He will be jabbering about what a pain in the neck you are, and even curse your ancestors. At best, look out of the window at the beautiful and blaring traffic. If you can't, because you are too short and therefore crushed between people's shoulders. ..then..may the Lord hear your prayers.

RULE NO.3 An ST Must Be A Superman/woman (Why On Earth should ST s Be Dumb??!!)

This is the most important step.The code of law does not specify that an ST can only get in after full ticket passengers, but the code of conduct of everybody makes it so. And if you act like a revolutionary by getting in first...you'll end up being the martyr.

And thus, an ST must have the innate ability to jump on to the bus as soon as it takes off. You might be dangling from the bus, but the your old powers from planet krypton will help you hold on...just like it helped your ancestor ST s. Do not be afraid when you brush past the motorcyclist. You will get used to it and perhaps even get acquainted.

Once you've mastered these, then I will  be proud to announce that you've just survived the Test of Survival.

Congratulations. Lets celebrate.
Cheers to the brains that thought of ST.

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